Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Rediscovering Hunger

As someone who has fought the weight loss battle (sometimes winning, and often losing) I had what can only be defined as a revelation one day.
I had had a particularly grueling day of manual labor that involved the bane of my existence –my lawn. As me and my 4 sons (They say ‘misery loves company’!) mowed and weed-whacked and hedge-trimmed and whatever else we did for several hours, I began to notice a sensation growing in my belly. It was, of course, the proper response to such a day of sweat and toil. I was hungry.
I suppose that many people would scratch their heads and wonder why this was an even remotely noticeable event in my life. We expend energy, we get hungry…basic science, right?  However, as someone who had developed a lifelong habit of responding to every craving by rushing to the refrigerator or burger place, the feeling was somehow foreign to me. Eating had been my comforter when I was sad, my method for celebrating when I was happy, and sometimes just the way I alleviated boredom. To my amazement, I realized that I couldn’t remember the last time I was truly hungry. I had crowded that extremely normal experience out of my daily life with unrestrained indulgence.
The hunger that I was experiencing was by no means a pleasant experience, hunger never is, in and of itself; but interestingly enough I actually enjoyed it. I found pleasure in eating as a response to a real need, and eating food with real nutritional value as opposed to ingesting empty calories simply because, quite frankly, I was addicted.
“Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. And after fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. (Matthew 4:1-2 ESV)”
There is a lot to be said for the often-neglected Biblical discipline of fasting. Clearly Jesus expected that his followers would fast since He told them in the Sermon on the Mount “…when you fast…” (Matthew 6:16) Not “if”, but “when”.  This, however, is not a posting about fasting as an event but rather about a fasted life.
Jesus, as he prepared to enter the ministry, made fasting the top priority. He seemed to know that the magnitude of His mission as well as His desire for oneness with the Father required a life free from distracting indulgence.
I would define what I’m calling a fasted life as:
The voluntary abstinence from non-productive or distracting indulgences for the purpose of greater intimacy with another (Father God, our spouse, etc).
At the risk of stating the obvious, when we fast, like Jesus, we become hungry. Conversely, when we indulge, we can never achieve or maintain a state of true hunger.  Just like in our natural bodies, our spiritual or inner man is never hungry after a steady stream of materialism and consumerism, worldly entertainment, religious self-righteousness, as well as thought patterns and attitudes of lust, fear, worry, jealousy, unforgiveness, etc.
We will often make the words “hunger” and “craving” interchangeable, but I think a legitimate distinction can be made. I will occasionally say to my wife, “I’m hungry for pizza”, but as I explained above, the chances are pretty good that (a) I am not truly hungry at all, and (b) the desire for pizza is more an attempt to satisfy a passing craving instead of provide sustenance to my physical body.
“Do not love this world nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you.  For the world offers only a craving for physical pleasure, a craving for everything we see, and pride in our achievements and possessions. These are not from the Father, but are from this world. And this world is fading away, along with everything that people crave. But anyone who does what pleases God will live forever.” 1 John 2:15-17 NLT
Most other versions render the word “craving” in the above passage as “lust”. This is not necessarily a reference to sexual lust, but to strong, unrestricted and destructive desire.  The questions we must ask ourselves are these: When was I last TRULY hungry for the Father? Have I filled my soul with the little treats that this life and my eternal enemy so willing throw at me, that I can’t even imagine being desperately hungry for only manna from heaven, Jesus, the bread of life, or will just any old dinner of fish and onions do (see Numbers 11:5-6, and John 6:22-70)?
Hunger is a very good thing. It keeps us focused on that which is truly beneficial; and we can only be truly hungry when we abandon all the silly things that are not beneficial at all (see 1 Corinthians 6:12).
What are you feasting on? Do you indulge every craving that comes your way, or are you holding out, enduring Hunger, for what will REALLY satisfy?
"Come, everyone who thirsts, come to the waters; and he who has no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without price. Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy? Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good,  and delight yourselves in rich food.” (Isaiah 55:1-2)

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Don't Spoil Your Dinner!

"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied." Matthew 5:6 ESV

Oftentimes a glimpse into the intimate communication of another requires the benefit of some context, What I mean is this: If I were to find myself in the position of being the proverbial "fly on the wall" during a private conversation between you and your spouse, you and you child, or you and your best friend, though I heard all of your words, that would by no means insure that I would comprehend all of your meaning. Conversation with those with whom we share the greatest intimacy is filled, as we all know, with subtle nuance, blatant "inside" humor, etc., as well as the usual lack of any kind of set-up or historical review of what was previously said ("I'm saying this because of last month when I said...") that is so necessary when sharing things with someone with whom we do not share such intimacy. If I am intimately in relationship with another person there is almost never a reason to preface my comments with "I've always felt that..." or "I truly believe that..." because the very nature of intimacy has already invited the other person into the realm what I feel and believe.

I feel compelled to make this clear because in my previous post, I shared intimate feelings that to the doctrinal "hawks" (among whom so often I find myself) may appear to be weak theology. For example, I know that nothing "will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:39 ESV)." I also do not subscribe to a line of thinking that makes my eternal salvation a matter of constant insecurity; that every wayward thought or misdeed jeopardizes my standing with the Father. On the contrary, I am convinced that by the work of Christ Jesus I am saved "to the uttermost (Hebrews 7:25)" and that no one can snatch me from His hand (John 10:28).

The "flip side" however, is this: my sin that I struggle with, or, more insidiously, that I willingly toy with, does diminish my ability to enjoy intimate connection with the Father; not positionally, but definitely functionally. It is this that my previously posted parable was addressing. The blog is called "Growing Hungry" because I believe that "hunger" is a condition I rarely find myself in as it concerns righteousness and relationship with the Father. I further contend that sin is the primary source of "empty calories" that keeps me from feasting on the Lord Jesus (see John chapter 6). Religion is another source of spiritual junk food, but that post is coming later.

People who really hunger for what Jesus offers can't afford to "spoil their dinner". Come to the table. Come often and come hungry.

Friday, June 24, 2011

"We Have Met the Enemy and He is Us." Pogo (via Walt Kelly)

Through a crowd of people I press. Obstacles in my way to keep me from Him. Is that Him? I caught just a glimpse and heard only a whisper. 

"Move! Make way!", I shout, "I must touch the Master! I want to be HEALED!"   

But they don't move. The swirling mob grows deeper, more expansive, and the distance between the Master and I ever greater. Desperation gives way to panic as the crowd becomes less a passive barrier and more and more an active and agressive resistance. Shoving. Pushing back. Blocking my path. Obstructing my view of my deepest Desire.

"Where did they come from?", I wonder. Few become many and many become many more. So many! But the horror grows not from the vast numbers of these enemies who would keep me from my Hope and Love, but rather from the image of their faces...for every face is mine.

There I am with a lustful, leering gaze. Here I am with a haughty look of pride. Over there I am blind with rage and void of compassion. Here I stumble along, barely awake, lazy and apathetic. There I stand with shifty, deceitful eyes, waiting to manipulate another. 

Lost. The many faces of the one man have become a sea so wide that I can no longer see Him. The lying, shouting, seducing voices so loud that I can no longer hear Him. 

"Are you still here? Can you silence the mob? Shout to me so that I can find you! Better yet, can you just slay them all - scatter their ashes on the wind- so that we can be alone? Yes, they are me, but I need YOU! Rescue me from the suffocating press of my own making!"